A Dream is a Wish for Somebodies
by Pharaoh-chan
Summary: Demyx reflects on his time with the Organization, his missions, his first experience with love, and lastly, his death. Contains possible Aku/Roku and other pairings. Starts within the events of 358/2 Days.


I remember feeling so…..angry. Which is a weird thing to say since I guess he was right. We don't have hearts. But I remember some kind of burning sensation in my gut. And I must've remembered feeling it before, because I'm pretty sure it felt like anger. When the duck yelled at me I had to strain to understand him.

_"You don't have any hearts!"_ He said. And Roxas had turned and agreed. I felt so mad then. He didn't have a heart either. And just because he got his Somebody, _what'shisface_ Sora back, didn't give him the right to scoff in our faces. I couldn't help myself anymore, I was so worked up. I actually wanted to fight him, to finish him off. I usually hated going on missions, and anything having to do with exerting myself over silly things, like fighting. But for Roxas, Sora, whatever and whoever he was now, to stand there and tell me I had no feelings, and no heart, was like a punch in the face, and I sure wasn't taking that sitting down. I felt like a mask of who I usually had acted like, Myde, slip away and fall to the ground. I glared at him, feeling a boiling dislike for him bubbling up. I growled at him, _"Silence, traitor."_ And his face had been so surprised, as if it were Roxas looking at me now, finally listening. Of course I didn't exactly think he'd be able to beat me. I know I'm lazy. But when it comes down to it, water's my specialty, duh, and I'm not a force to be reckoned with. The next thing I knew, my precious Arpeggio had vanished from my hands and I felt lightheaded. And finally, I felt myself being sucked away. It sorta feels like travelling through the dark portals we summon, except when you vanish, you don't have the strength to summon anything, and it sucks you away all on its own. There's a short period of time where you don't see anything, hear anything, or think anything. You're just there and not there all at the same time. It's not like how humans die at all. It's totally different. There's no bright light at the end of the tunnel. There's no angel that comes to hold your hand. There's no purgatory, like humans say there is, or an Underworld for Nobodies. We're not really alive. So we can't truly die. We're more or less, as IV once tried to explain to me, "_Soulless orbs floating around in the abyss of the dark realm. Not only aren't we beings, but we are not even capable of realizing dreams or anything of a strenuous emotional nature. We simply strive to survive, as would any organism, even of the smallest and most primitive." _

Talk about your case of nerdy pathetic old geezer right? In a sense, he was right, we were similar to humans, but only in the beginning. We survived, which is what most small humans learn how to do first. Like learning how to cry when you're hungry, or hide when you've done something you think is wrong. Except take away crying or feeling guilty or any of those feelings. We basically acted on instinct, and only that, because we had no feelings to guide our reasoning. The only instincts we had were basic needs for food, water, stimulation, and of course the top on the Organization's list, completing Kingdom Hearts.

Though what kind of people we were before somehow shone through the shells that we were left with now, in small cases anyway. Which is what I guess made us so special, and why we were in Organization XIII.

In Larxene's case, she was probably psychotic as a human. And I guess the reason why she was there was because she probably threatened to slaughter the Superior if he didn't let her join. Just a theory.

Lea was the one who brought me to the Organization. Err….Axel, I mean. He found me wandering around somewhere, although I can't remember where, or what happened. I think I was a total zombie the first few days. I dunno, I think it takes you a while to realize you're THERE, and not just in an environmental kind of way, but in the mental kind of way.

Isn't it funny? You don't remember your birth but you always remember how it was you died? Birth's supposed to be something people find happy, and joyful, but as a Nobody it's indifferent, and all it means for you is a life of missions and obeying. And death is sad, looked at as a terrible loss for humans. For Nobodies, no one cares if you die, they just replace you, or worse, send someone else in your place to do the job you couldn't. No one misses you. No one remembers you.

The more I thought about the differences between humans and Nobodies, the more….I guess….intrigued you could say, I got. Humans seemed so wonderful at times. Zexion pointed out to me one day that _"The human race does have their downfalls, such as creating wars, famine, and above all creating nuisances of themselves and their environments. It's no surprise that so many Heartless are created each day. The darkness within their hearts is always growing, and forever feeding on the negative qualities that make them human. Is that not ironic, IX?" _

Oh yeah. Very ironic. Coming from someone who was killed for meddling in the war at Castle Oblivion. I'm still relieved from not being sent there.

Anyway….for all the negative qualities, I always wondered why Xemnas…err….Superior wanted a heart so badly. He didn't seem phased by it, more or less as intrigued by them as I was. 

Marluxia tried to tell me about what he found most interesting but I was too weirded out by the way he explained it to understand.

_"Demyx dear ,there's more to a heart then those simpletons care to mention. Not only are hearts full of such an undying, relentless rage, but also that of a sweeter more powerful emotion. One called love. Love is important, remember that. And above all, love can be used to an advantage. Love is an emotion that can be twisted around, forged, and mangled, and still appear as sultry and sweet as an pure love could wager. _

I was still too stuck on the 'Demyx-_dear_' to hear much anything else at the time. I wouldn't have understood anyways. I mean, I didn't catch on to that sort of thing, being a Nobody. I just did what I remembered doing before, and it worked pretty well. I found out I was a musician, so my weapon of choice was my sitar, infamously known to me as Arpeggio. I was pretty good at it, if I do say so myself. Most of the other members yelled at me for…what did they call it…._infernal racket?_ How rude.

In any case, that was pretty much a taste of what daily life was like. Living with creatures like you. Carrying out mindless missions, which I'll explain eventually, and doing what we remembered how to do. But it seemed everyone had a different reason for getting their hearts back. Me, I had no idea what I'd do with one, but it wasn't until a little while later I found out why they were so important.


End file.
